why god hates me

Wanna know why drugs are bad, kids???

Well, just click here to watch the latest cracked-out video from Pete Doherty to find out the dangers of smack, meth, heroin and everything in between!

Since it’s a holiday weekend, you don’t have to spend your Sunday catching up on homework. Why not use the extra time to do something for fun?  Bake some brownies, go for a run, or…learn judo!

Russian Prime Minister Vladmir Putin has released a DVD tutorial called “Let’s Learn Judo with Vladmir Putin.” And as you [...]

(We have discussed Adderall a lot in the past few months and it has really opened our eyes. Adderall is used in ways we never imagined to do things we never knew it did. And now we find out it contributes to an issue we never considered: cheating. One finaly CollegeCandy writer discusses her experiences [...]

Getting over a guy can be tough, especially if he ended things before you were ready to end them. It’s hard enough to try to slip back into the single lifestyle and get over the boy who hurt you when the breakup cuts all of your ties; however, it’s even more difficult when you [...]

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupididty of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself [...]

Fall and winter fashion is all about boots, and I don’t mean Uggs. Boots can update any outfit, from that cute dress for the bar to those skinny jeans you wear to class. Luckily, there are tons of different looks to choose from for every style…and every budget.
Check out my boot picks for fall below; [...]

Bobby didn’t believe that Enstrom’s “Unconditional Guarantee” was truly unconditional, so he sent an email to Enstrom complaining that his Almond Toffee did not perform well as a tax preparer.

Bobby submitted the following through Enstrom’s web form:

Your Almond Toffee does not work well as a tax preparer. Per your unconditional guarantee, I formally request my monies to be refunded at the earliest possible date to:

[redacted]

Please confirm receipt of this email and the issuance of my refund at the earliest opportunity.

Best regards,

Bobby

Enstrom quickly replied:

Thank you for contacting Enstrom Candies Customer Care Department. We would be more then happy to replace the box of toffee as stated in our guarantee. Would you please provide your order number or customer number so I can do so?

To place an order, please contact Enstrom Candies Call Center at 1-800-367-8766 (24 hours 7 days a week) or visit our website at www.Enstrom.com. Should you need further assistance, please reply to our email or contact Customer Care Department at 1-800-367-8777.

Jessica Shaner
Customer Service Representative
Enstrom Candies

Wow, that is an unconditional guarantee! Bobby was shocked by the response, and since he isn’t a colossal jerk, he didn’t follow through with his request. The satisfaction that Enstrom would honor their guarantee was more than enough. Plus, we’re told that the toffee was excellent. Delicious work, Enstrom!

As part of their multi-pronged effort to fight the financial Godzilla besieging the world economy, the European Commission today proposed a 14-day no-questions-asked return period for any online purchases made within the European Union. The “two-week cooling-off period” is designed to give consumers a chance to shop across borders for the best prices without worrying about return policies. The practically adorable European decision to respond to a financial crisis with consumer protections made us want to look inwards at some of the onerous return policies Americans face.

Two come to mind: Brookstone and American Apparel.

Brookstone’s return policy is simple:

If a product purchased at Brookstone does not meet your expectations, you may return it with receipt within 30 days of purchase for a refund, merchandise credit or exchange. We will not accept any returns without a receipt.

Sounds fair, until you consider that there aren’t any provisions for gifts. Without the receipt, you’re stuck holding a potentially unwanted gift. Even if you bring the unopened mint-condition item to the store, point to the exact same item on the shelf, and ask to perform an exchange, they will refuse. You have only one option: ask the gift-giver for the receipt, an obviously impossible request no half-decent person would make.

American Apparel can’t even settle on a return policy. If you buy from their online store, they offer a full refund, but if you visit their brick and mortar locations, you can only receive store credit. So if you do your friend a favor and pick up a few shirts, and it turns out you were sold the wrong ones, you’re entirely out of luck and stuck with an unwanted store credit.

Is either policy unique? No. We know there are companies with vastly more farcical policies we want to hear about them. Fill the comments with the worst return policies you’ve seen. And no, “all sales final” doesn’t count.

EU to expand e-shoppers’ rights [BBC]
(Photo: theogeo)

Society has determined that service a restaurant is worth between 15%-20% of the final bill, but is it ever acceptable not to tip?

Science tells us there is almost no correlation between tips and good service, but surveys show that Americans relish the power to tip because we falsely believe it provides an incentive to provide good service.

Let’s consider a situation: you go out to one of your regular dinner spots for a snack with friends. The place isn’t too busy, and you’re not too hungry, so you only order a salad and a side dish. Your friends don’t get their food for almost 40 minutes. You get nothing. After repeatedly flagging down the waitstaff, you still can’t get your salad. Another 30 minutes goes by before your food finally arrives, around the time your friends are finishing their meal.

Obviously, it’s not the end of the world and there are far more disturbing stories littering the internet. Before asking what kind of tip this service merits, let’s travel with the New York Times to San Diego to visit a small restaurant called the Linkery. The Linkery’s waitstaff doesn’t accept tips. Instead, they levy an 18% service charge on all sit-down meals, which is split 3-1 between the waitstaff and the kitchen. If customers want to tip more, they are invited to donate to the restaurant’s charity of the month.

…every so often diners at the Linkery take offense. “I’ll go over to the table and ask if there is a problem with the service,” McGuan, the general manager, says. “If there is, then I offer to remove the service charge. Almost always, the customers’ issue isn’t about the service but about not being able to handle their loss of control.”

In some instances, this restaurant with a uniform charge completely removes the service fee, resulting in no tip.

Keeping that in mind:

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Why Tip? [The New York Times]
(Photo: Getty)

The Leading Hotels of the World want you to know they are still committed to offering 6,000 five-star hotel rooms for $19.28. The contest, originally conceived as a way to honor the association’s 1928 formation, is proving ironically successful, fusing a modern giveaway with 1928 technology. That whole email do-over idea? Silly! Forget it even existed. The group has gone and hired themselves some internet sherpas to help run the contest, and here’s what they’ve come up with….

There is now a dedicated website, and your better check it often if you want to beat out the 150,000 strong mob to win a snazzy hotel room. At least that is what Leading Hotels apologizer-in-chief Ted Tang said in what he promises will be the final update:

Dear Internets,

I would like to once again express my gratitude for your continued support, understanding, and patience with The Leading Hotels of the World. Since October 1, we have explored and evaluated many solutions to the technological failures encountered during the online USD 19.28 Sale.

I am delighted to inform you that today we selected Akamai Technologies, Inc., the world premier web content delivery network, with clients such as Yahoo, Travelocity, and Amazon. Together we are working diligently to finalize a new procedure whereby you, as well as the other 150,000 registrants, will have a chance to secure one of the originally allotted 6,000 room nights that are available at the rate of USD 19.28.

In developing a fair and foolproof platform, we have been faced with various considerations. Timing - both on the developmental front as well as for your trip-planning purposes - has proven to be our major and foremost concern. We chose to preserve the hotel availability dates, which in most cases began on November 1, as to not delay the promotion by several months. We also opted to maintain the promotion on a first-come, first-served basis. To make the offer a random selection or lottery would significantly delay the re-launch due to complicated international regulations. Lastly, we wanted to ensure successful communication to registrants in a prompt manner. We are now confident that, with Akamai, we have found a solution that addresses all of these challenges.

Please note that you will not be receiving any further emails, rather, we have decided to post all future updates and details on a dedicated website at www.lhw.com/1928status, which will go live on Monday, October 13. This will allow all registrants, throughout the various parts of the globe, simultaneous and equal access to the USD 19.28 updates around the clock. All updates will indicate the date and time of posting. Please know that we have intentionally communicated this website address only to registrants in order not to dilute your chances of securing a reservation at the promotional rate. We will announce the details of the new USD 19.28 promotion, no later than Friday, October 17, which will occur the following week. The sale details will be posted at least 48 hours before the promotion begins.

With thanks,

Ted Teng
President & CEO
The Leading Hotels of the World, Ltd.

Sorry, Ted, for posting the link to the super-secret website. We didn’t mean to dilute the contest or anything, but since it’s out there now, how about an RSS feed?

Keep checking this site, and by Friday at the latest (maybe sooner! surprise!) we’ll find out when the mob gathers next.

1928 Status Page [Leading Hotels of the World]
PREVIOUSLY: Leading Hotels Do-Over Postponed
Do-Over Announced By Leading Hotels Of The World
$19.28 5-Star Hotel Room Promo Ends In Fiasco
Book A World-Class Hotel Room For Only $19.28 Per Night
(Photo: Getty)